The word “repristinate” is not a commonly used word. In simplest terms, it means to “restore to an original state or condition”–like repairing and repainting an old white picket fence. A ‘repristinator’ (my word) is one who engages in the task of restoring that original state. For our purposes, let’s apply this word to God’s plan for building a family that takes seriously their responsibility to train up the next generation to know, love, and serve Christ… and develop a healthy view of and relationship in the family of God.

To that end, let me offer three critical components of what an effective repristinating process might look like in the light of God’s Word.

1. Teach our children and grandchildren to love the church (the family of God)

In his book, The Family at Church, Scott Brown talks about parents (and I would add grandparents) as “tour guides”who, by Divine appointment, are given the “job to show your children (grandchildren too) wonders they’ve never seen before.” One of the “wonders” Scott discusses at great length is the wonder of the family of God. He reminds those in authority in the family to do everything possible “to make the local church sweet. Exult in her importance. Extol her beauty before your children. Why? So that your children will have an in-depth guided tour of the treasures of the gospel.”

In other words, family leaders have a major responsibility to help the next generations go beyond simply attending church. We are to teach those generations to love and treasure this amazing family we have been given through Christ—with all her warts and blemishes. In fact, I would argue there are not many things more important than assuming this responsibility. When we take this seriously, we are reminding them about what the Gospel is really all about, and why the Church is called the Bride of Christ (of which they are part).

The family has primary responsibility for sharing the Gospel with the next generation and introducing them to the family of God where that Gospel transformation is at work in every part to build up the body of Christ so that we “grow up into Him, who is the Head, that is Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work” (Eph. 4:15-16).

2. The church should never be placed in the role of doing what is ours to do as parents and grandparents.

As parents and grandparents, we are critical to the next generations knowing the Gospel and walking by faith. There is no greater joy than to see our children walking in the truth, and there is no greater pain when they aren’t. May it not be the case because we did not seize every opportunity to show them the fragrance of Christ in us, and thereby give them every reason to embrace the Good News, rather than lots of reasons not to embrace it. The family is the primary means through which God will lead the next generation to walk in the truth. You can’t outsource that responsibility and expect there to be fruit.

Never let it be said that if the next generations want nothing to do with the Gospel or the church it is because we never showed them how the Gospel impacts us or brought them into the presence of the family of God in any beautiful and life-transforming way? It is no surprise that so many graduate from high school and never step foot in the local church again. For many families the idea of showing our children the wonder and blessing of the knowing Christ and being part of His family is not even on their radar screen. Church services are often nothing more than something to do on the weekend when there’s not something we think is more important to do, let alone family time in the Word.

As a volunteer leader in our High School Student Ministries at my church, I am troubled by how few of families take this responsibility seriously. But those who do have seen their sons and daughters develop into young adults who are learning what it means to know, love and serve Christ, and to be a valued member of this family of God despite its warts and blemishes. Which brings me to my next point…

3. Participate as a family in the worship and preaching services in your church.

I know there will be many reading this who will roll their eyes at the thought of having their children in worship with them. That’s because we are used to thinking about this service as “adult worship”, and so we send our children off to “children’s church” so they won’t be bored or create a disturbance during the service. There will images of fidgety kids that raise the eyebrows of some of our older congregants, especially during the preaching when sermons, directed solely to adults, go right over their heads. I understand the challenges in our modern world, and I know this is a sticky topic for many people, but please hear me out and let me share a couple of thoughts with you.

First of all, the general practice of age-segregation in the church is a fairly recent phenomenon—somewhere with the last 150 years. I am not opposed to certain age-segregated options such as a nursery, or even an early childhood “children’s church”. But I would ask us to reconsider whether “children’s church” as currently practiced in most churches—which can be a very intentional teaching time for children—is a best practice for the local church. Perhaps more of us who are older just need to learn to cope with a little restlessness for a much greater benefit and gain.

Help your children finds ways to engage with opportunities for serving in those services with other adults. Things like greeters, ushering, or handing out bulletins can be great opportunities for inter-generational involvement. How about helping with Communion or working in some aspect of the tech team? I love seeing families serving together with other older adults in our church family. It takes intentionality, parents. Yes, it can be a good thing to serve in some aspect of the children’s ministry, but that will take them away from the larger family of God. Help them seek opportunities that expose them to all the generations.

So, here’s my challenge. Are you willing to be a “reprisintator” and  join the Repristination Team? If you are, prepare yourself for resistance, but know that the battle for the hearts, minds, and souls of each generation, especially in your family, is worth the cost.

Cavin Harper is a graduate of Baylor University and Denver Seminary, Cavin Harper served as an associate pastor for 17 years before founding ElderQuest Ministrieswhich later became known as the Christian Grandparenting Network. He writes a weekly blog on grandparenting and has authored several books including Courageous Grandparenting: Building a Legacy Worth Outliving.

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